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The origin of pets...
Adam and Eve said, "Lord, when we were in the garden, you walked
with us every day. Now we do not see you any more. We are lonesome here, and it is difficult for us to remember
how much you love us."
And God said, "No problem! I will create a companion for you that will be with you forever
and who will be a reflection of my love for you even when you cannot see me. Regardless of how selfish or childish or
unlovable you may be, this new companion will accept you as you are and will love you as I do, in spite of yourselves."
And
God created a new animal to be a companion for Adam and eve. And it was a good animal. And God was pleased.
And
the new animal was pleased to be with Adam and Eve and he wagged his tail. And Adam said, "Lord, I have already named
all the animals in the Kingdom and I cannot think of a name for this new animal." And God said, "No problem. Because
I have created this new animal to be a reflection of my love for you, his name will be a reflection of my own name, and you
will call him DOG."
And dog lived with Adam and Eve and was a companion to them and loved them. And they were
comforted.
And God was pleased.
And dog was content and wagged his tail.
After a while, it came to pass
that an angel came to the Lord and said, "Lord, Adam and Eve have become filled with pride. They strut and preen like
peacocks and they believe they are worthy of adoration. Dog has indeed taught them that they are loved, but perhaps
too well."
And God said, "No problem. I will create a companion who will be with them forever and who will see
them as they are. The companion will remind them of their limitations, so they will know that they are not always worthy
of adoration."
And God created CAT to be a companion to Adam and Eve.
And cat would not obey them. And
when Adam and Eve gazed into the cat's eyes, they were reminded that they were not supreme beings.
And Adam and Eve
learned humility. And they were greatly improved.
And God was pleased.
And Dog was happy.
And Cat
didn't give a shit one way or the other.
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